Monday, May 02, 2005


So, over at One Child several days past, a new meme: name five things your peers are wild about, but which you don't really "get." This is going to be so easy. Before I get into that, though, will you go read his responses? Beauty. I totally envy his writing. And his ability to share it with such confidence. 'Course, the confidence could come from the fact that his writing is great... Okay, for my sub-standard, non-poetic, bad-funny answers: 1. Fucking hairy wildebeast-y boots, at this time of year. A few weeks back, I saw a really cute girl at Fairway wearing an outfit so cool I was tempted to tell her how nice she looked--little orange ribbed clingy matching skirt and sweater set...until I looked down and saw she was wearing Uggs. Goddamn. 2. Hip hop/gangsta lit. I try to listen to the people who hold it up as a positive thing, something that gets people reading, but then I pick up something--anything published by Triple Crown, for instance--read just the back cover copy, find generally a minimum of three major spelling errors (Don't. Get. Me. Started. On. Wording. Or subject. Or fuck it, the cover art, half the time.) And I seriously get angry right there. I start talking to myself about how these bitches could at least hire a damn copyeditor or some shit, from a local college newspaper or something if they can't afford a real one, call it an internship, damn, have a whole generation of bitches who will never know the difference between "they're," "there," and "their".... Then I toss it down and storm off in a huff. 3. Needing to have the teeniest, tiniest cell phone at any cost. When I was temping, I worked in a Verizon store for about a month. I distinctly remember a kid who couldn't have been older than 17 showing off his new phone, which was supposed to be all the rage. He'd paid close to $700. It was so small he couldn't hold it up to his ear properly. And it had no useful features. 4. Motivation in a rubber band. I'm glad they help raise money for a good cause. I am. And I know they inspire. But there is something so wrong to me about grown folks wearing the '05 take on jelly bracelets. And those little bands don't even come in great colors. What are they, yellow, green? So you kinda look like you just escaped from some institution. 5. Super-skinny over, say, strong or shapely. I'm not hating on skinny women. But I do think it's time for someone to say skinny does not look good on every body. And no, I did not mean to write "everybody," and hit the space bar accidentally. I meant "every body." We come in different colors, heights and bone structures, people. A slight, thin-boned, narrow hipped woman looks like she should be skinny, so when she is, it doesn't usually look awkward. But a super-skinny woman who has solid bones and broad hips just looks like she starves herself, and her too-skinny-to-ever-meet thighs look like the warped, dried-out swinging doors of a ghost-town saloon when she walks down the street. Please, go with your bone structure! I'm trying to. Not likely I'll ever be the roughly 110 lbs. I should be, but, you know. I gotta have something to shoot for.


At 5/02/2005 09:13:00 PM, Blogger deborah said...

Oh I totally agree on the those damn rubber band bracelets. I hate them with a passion. On the bus, a girl was telling her friend how poor she is, and how she couldnt afford to give anything to the tsunami appeal. Fine. Thats cool. She was catching a bus out of campus, i assume she was a student. But THEN she whips out a bag, and inside are 4 (YES 4!) of those jelly bands, and then goes on to tell her friend how it cost her this much, and it will be her motivation to be a better person. What the?????

At 5/02/2005 09:18:00 PM, Blogger ducklet said...

Sid, these are great answers! the only reason i wrote what i did was because i couldn't come up with real answers like this. but thanks for the shout out ;)

At 5/03/2005 11:11:00 PM, Blogger Sid said...

Saff, I agree. What the????

Brando, any time! You are a joy to read! Thanks for popping in!


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