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Tuesday, May 31, 2005

The thing about diets is that they suck.

Diets require that you trick yourself into believing crazy things. Things like, "Oh no, this piece of cardboard topped with spreadable plastic and vegan jerky is really quite delicious. It almost tastes like pizza!" Or "You know, I quite like eating healthy foods. It makes my system feel all clean." Unfortunately, not being fat is a rather good thing. I don't care what NAAFA tells you. Yeah, you can be fat and relatively fit, but everything is muchmuch easier if you aren't fat. And I'd much rather be fit and strong and lean than fit-ish and fat. I get a twisted kind of happy doing shit like ellipticalling for an hour or doing the downward dog and plank pose, and the easier those bitches are, the happier I am, because it's just a matter of time before I can run around kicking ass like Jet Li. Or, you know, uh, jogging and stuff. Which, I swear to god, is the only thing that is keeping me from ordering a giant bowl of cold sesame noodles topped with vegetarian "duck" right now. That, and this picture. Kidding. But that's hot. Am I the only person who is more excited now that he's got ink? Can we get a bill on his mandatory-at-all-times-henceforth-for-the-good-of-the-nation-nudity written into law? Maybe tack it on to some banal legislation on transportation? Shit, that's what I call porkbarreling! Yeah, even I don't know what I'm talking about anymore.

4 Comments:

At 6/01/2005 12:35:00 AM, Blogger Mary said...

Holy crap - I used to eat those Ry-shits with a bit of tuna and sprinking of cheese back when I was 18 and soooo overweight. *eye roll* I didn't know they still even made them. Ack. Not yummy! Rock = yummy.

 
At 6/01/2005 10:20:00 PM, Blogger Viv said...

I like eating healthy at times! I mean, if I have too much grease, my body can feel it. Hell, I feel like shit after eating too much grease. I almost want to eat a shitload of carrots.

 
At 6/01/2005 10:27:00 PM, Blogger Sid said...

Mary: They live! Damn them. Actually, I apparently eat the narstiest ones, "flavorful fiber," The others, I hear, are better.

Viv: You're right, of course. But sometimes, goddarnit, a girl wants a donut! Not twelve; just one or three. But she can't have one, because if she does shell get loopy, and then the diet is shot to hell. Or so I've been told *guilty look*

 
At 6/01/2005 11:51:00 PM, Blogger Viv said...

Don't feel bad about one or two donuts as long as you're working out. I don't feel bad about the grease I eat because I also eat a hell of a lot of veggies and fruit to counterbalance it.

 

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